An
Interview with Victor Rivers, an accomplished actor, a survivor of domestic violence
and advocate November, 2003
When
he was 12 years old, Victor Rivers tried to buy a gun to kill his abusive father.
Today, he is an actor and an advocate against domestic violence.
Victor
Rivers immigrated to the United States with his family from Cuba when he was almost
2 years old. Beginning early in his childhood, Victor's father abused him along
with his mother and five siblings. Not
surprisingly, the violence escalated as Victor grew older. Enduring beatings from
his father with objects ranging from a belt to a meat tenderizer, Victor often
placed himself in harm's way to protect other members of his family from his father's
abuse. Victor was burned, locked in closets, and tied up. He once watched his
father attack his mother, who was eight months pregnant with his brother Robert,
kicking her repeatedly in the stomach. Born disabled, Robert was institutionalized
his whole life. He died before he turned 10.
Victor,
who labels himself "a talker," attempted repeatedly to tell others of
his fathers' abuse. His friends, however, admired his father, calling him "cool."
No one believed that a man who loaded all the neighborhood kids in the car and
took them out for ice cream was capable of such heinous acts of violence. Victor
describes his father as a chameleon, calculating and cold, who purposely hit Victor
in places where others would not see his bruises.
When
Victor finally gathered the courage to go to a police station and show them the
welts, burns and bruises on his body, the police told him the issue was a private,
family matter and instructed Victor to "take care of it himself." So,
at 12 years old, in a desperate attempt to protect himself and his family, Victor
tried to buy a gun to kill his father. Ultimately, his attempt to purchase a gun
failed and Victor and his family continued to suffer brutal attacks from his father
in secret. When
he grew large enough, Victor physically confronted his father, who cowered at
Victor's newfound aggression. Believing his father would later react by trying
to kill him, Victor ran away from home when he was 15. After bouncing through
many foster homes, and finding temporary acceptance and sanctuary in gang life,
Victor was taken in by a loving Cuban family who showed him positive and appropriate
displays of affection. Amazingly, Victor eventually was elected senior class president
of his high school and lettered in four sports. He went on to play football at
Florida State University on a full scholarship, and was mentored by head coach
Bobby Bowden. The Miami Dolphins later drafted him.
Victor
still reflects on the young boy who heard his mother call the police and pleaded
in broken English for help that never came. Victor's
indomitable spirit and years of acting out roles to escape his abusive childhood
led him to a career in acting. He can be seen in films such as "The Mask
of Zorro," "Fear City," "The Hulk," "The Distinguished
Gentleman" and "Amistad." Victor
uses his fame and success as an actor to speak out against domestic violence and
to encourage other men to do the same. He is less concerned with the batterers
than he is with the "men who stand by silently." Victor believes "other
men need to speak up," and through a sports team analogy, he artfully delivers
the message that "men need to step up to the plate and say that [abusive]
behavior is unacceptable. Peer pressure is just as powerful in adults as it is
in children.
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